The particulars are not important, but the exchange reminded me that us subs and pups sometimes forget a deep and essential truth:
Masters are Human too.
All too often - in our fantasies and in our play - we project so much upon our Handlers and Masters that we forget that under all that regalia and Dominance there is a Man - and all men have their frailties and weaknesses, stresses and upsets. Just because He is encased in a beautiful shell of leather, do not forget that His shoulders are only so wide - and He cannot carry both His problems and yours (at least, not for long!)
As subs and pups, we often use play as a way to momentarily escape - or to explore the sensitive underbelly of our psyche: most often to do with issues of personal power, self-worth and submission. But equally, Masters have those same issues too!
We think that surrendering power is hard: try being the Man learning to accept that power - and the responsibility which that entails. The Man who finds He has to be Master to both you and Himself.
We think that discovering a desire to be dominated is a big deal - but our society is full of role models for the honour in self-sacrifice; there are far fewer positive models for the Man who takes control over others, or who inflicts pain and suffering. Imagine the struggle to contain *that* self-revelation within the belief that you are still a 'good person'...
When we pups have a problem, it is our natural reaction to seek solace and advice from our Masters. But where does a Master go when He finds Himself overwhelmed?
The Sir i spoke to confessed that He found it hard to ask for help - or to rely on others. A Master is 'supposed' to be self-contained and strong, and it just wasn't in His nature to accept 'defeat'. He felt that asking for help was a form of attention seeking - a weakness that he could not allow Himself.
But, it's not attention seeking to ask for help when you need it - just wisdom.
Masters *are* human too - and need the love and support that every man needs. Just as He supports us when we need it - so it is up to us to notice when He needs that help too, and to freely give Him the support He needs. Without comment or drama - just quietly and with love and compassion.
It is up to us to remind Him that - sometimes - it is OK for Him to lie back and let us take the strain. That our service can include making His life a little easier and less fraught - not just sexually, but emotionally too.
In fact - isn't that the exact meaning of service anyway - and making our Man happy the very reason we were called to be pups in the first place?